Letters Of The Heart
by myownwayx
Summary: Kurt's lost himself so does the only thing he can think of, he leaves. A series of letters from Kurt to Blaine. Can Kurt find himself and keep Blaine? Spolers for series 3! Please Read!
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: So I know I probably shouldn't be writing another story. I have so much to do, but this idea just came into my head and I had to write it. I wanted to post it before I lost motivation for it. **

**SPOILERS FOR SERIES 3 FINALE! **

**This story will be written purely in letter form, going from Kurt to Blaine. The writing styles will hopefully change if I have done my job properly. This first part is supposed to sound rushed, and misleading, because I have put myself in Kurt's shoes as I wrote it (As fancy and hard as that was) so I hope I conveyed this. **

**Please let me know what you think. **

**Lastly; the lyrics mentioned in this chapter is 'Adam Lambert – A Loaded Smile' Listening to this song really helped me write this and have more ideas. **

**Letters of The Heart **

**Prologue **

Blaine,

Lying here staring at you, I can't help but think that you're the most beautiful, most perfect person on this world. Right now you have this little smile on your face and I wonder if you're dreaming on me. You always tell me when you do. You dream of us together, happily and old. Though the thought of me being old scares me, and sometimes I think you make up these stories of horrid knitted cardigans with no fancy label, and creaking rocking chairs just to see me pout. I think you're beautiful. I wish you could see that too. You're shy sometimes. Too shy. Except when you're singing. I could listen to you singing all day. All week. All month... I'm skipping my point. I'm nervous. Even as I write this I'm shaking.

I know that when you read this, you're going to hate me. I know that you will, but I hope that you don't. The past three months have been so hard for me. I know that you know this, and you've been so supportive and amazing and I have just been horrible. Grouchy. A bitch. Not getting accepting into NYADA has knocked my confidence. I thought I had gotten in. We all did. My life had been planned out around me going there, our life has. And now, knowing that I'm not...I don't know what to do. I know we planned on me auditioning again next year, but what if I'm not good enough then? I couldn't handle the rejection twice. I just couldn't.

I don't want to ruin your senior year. And I know that you're going to think that I am by leaving you. But I need you to know that I am NOT leaving you. I'm leaving this town, and I'm trying to leave this doubt behind. I've never not believed in myself. Even when I was being bullied, I was still confident in myself, but right now? I don't know who I am any more. Please, please don't hate me Blaine.

I love you. I'm going to New York. And I know long distant relationships are hard, but I want you to be happy whilst I'm gone. I will write to you. And I will give you my address because I know that you wont come and find me unless I ask you to. You're the kindest, most amazing man in the world. And it kills me to leave. But I would never leave you unless I had to.

I believe in destiny. I know we'll be together again soon. There's no one else in the world for me except you, and my heart is breaking in two right now. When I'm ready I will phone you, I can't go too long without hearing your voice.

You make me complete Blaine. I just need to find who me is again.

Yours forever.

Kurt.

_- "Everything just falls into place, but I think I just need a little more time, and yeah I know that life has changed, but honestly I don't know if we'll survive..." _


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: A huge thank you MusicalRose1210 For being my first and only review you are awesome thanks you for reading I hope you enjoy this one x **

**Chapter 1**

Blaine.

I miss you. I hope that you're okay. It's been horrible without you, I can only think of how you're feeling. I'm so sorry I left you and I really need you to be okay.

I've found a Nice little flat. It's nothing special. My basement was bigger then the whole place but it's okay for now. Nothing is home without you.

It's been almost three weeks since I last had you in my arms. I feel empty without you. I know that I'll see you soon.

I've got a job. You always teased me saying I'd never e able to work a day in my life. Too pampered. I hated when you said that to me the first time. But then you told me that you loved me and would pamper me for the rest of my life with kisses. God I miss your kisses. You're amazing and I miss you and I love you. It's not a special job. Just waiting tables at a local diner. The people are stuck up but they're okay.

What have you been doing? Please to me everything. Even though I'm far away physically I want you to know that I'm always going to be in your heart.

I have to go. My shift starts in an hour. I'm going to write you every day. I hope you write back. Please Don't come and find me. I'm not ready yet. I just need you to understand. Please.

Yours forever.  
Kurt x


End file.
